Citizen Nades - By R. Nadeswaran
Necessity, it is said, is the mother of invention. In the case of Selangor, to remain as the country’s only developed state (whatever that means) it has to be innovative. And there’s no dearth of people or organisations that can come up with ideas and ways to make a little profit here and there to fill up the coffers.Rent seekers are plentiful; the gravy train is getting longer by the day; cronies have to be rewarded and machinery needs money to be oiled. Therefore, there can be a hundred and one reasons (however plausible they can be) to create some revenue earning source to keep everything going.
Selangor, if the claims are to be believed, has the highest number of tourist arrivals and is the largest exporter in the country. But that’s not because of its achievements.The state is fortunate that the country’s major airport, the Kuala Lumpur International Airport (KLIA) and the country’s number one export hub, Port Klang, are located here.
Having self-proclaimed this dubious honour with concocted statistics and a half-baked survey, it can now add another feather to its cap. With the high literacy rate, there would be enough people to come up with bird-brained ideas and non-starters just to earn a big fee or a small percentage of the proceeds.Hence, someone had been putting on his thinking cap and came out with a gem which needs no capital investment, no manpower, no machinery and more importantly, no effort. All he has to do is to sit and collect money and keep praying for the heavens to open up.
It is only a matter of time before those in the state will be carrying meters which would calculate the amount of air they breathe and get charged for it. No, it’s not a joke because the way it is going, it could get an honourable mention in that book of records. On the same premise, you could even end up paying for the amount of sunlight you receive. And by the way, don’t discount the possibility of being charged for the air we exhale!
According to a circular (reproduced at bottom) from the Selangor Water Authority (LUAS), factories and golf clubs will have to apply for a licence and then have to pay for rain water! And this is no joke either. The circular, which cites a state enactment of 1999, also acts as a "Notis Pemberitahuan Kesalahan" (Notice of Offence) and requires all commercial organisations to fill up a form and make the necessary declarations.
Golf clubs in particular argue that the ponds in the courses not only exist as water hazards for the golfer to conquer; they also act as retention ponds for rain water. If there are no such ponds, they argue, rain water would flow into public drains causing floods. The rain water collected in the ponds is used to water the greens and fairways, hence saving large amounts of water so that there is enough treated water for public use.
When someone was convicted for oral sex in Singapore, the joke that went around was that in Singapore, you can’t spit and you can’t swallow. Now, In Selangor, you even have to pay to the state whenever God answers the farmers’ prayers! But even if it can be argued that the rates are nominal, the real issue is: Can you propose a levy for God-sent water? The simple way to get out of it is by saying that there is such a law. But is the law fair? Will it be against public interest? But does anyone care?
No, with the "fully-developed state" status, anything goes, because the tagline is Semuanya OK!
The Sun
